The other side of Loneliness

11 October 2016

I’ve been putting off posting this for a couple of months now, and I’m not really sure why! My blog is somewhere that I feel I can have a little ramble about life things every now and then, and this is one of those posts. It’s a subject that I’ve been thinking about a lot recently, and I know what you’re thinking – “She’s just got married! How can she talk about this?” But, I’m hoping it’s something that a few people can read and get.
I was having one of those long conversations with a friend who I don’t get to see that often, and we came to a conclusion that being alone and feeling lonely can be confused as the same thing. BUT...they’re both so different;
You can be completely alone, but feel so content and never feel like you need to be around other people.
Or, on the other hand you can be surrounded by people and feel incredibly lonely.
Whether or not loneliness is a bad thing it can still really suck and have a negative effect on your life. I’m one of those people that’s happy in their own company. I find that I get more s**t done when I’m on my own and maybe because of my anxiety, I find it a lot easier and calming.
Don’t get me wrong, I love my friends and really wish I could see more of them. I do go through blue moments when I feel really lonely not having any of my girls to hang out with at a moment’s notice, but as you get older life changes, and you all have your own stuff to be getting on with.
I decided a while ago to try and overcome the negativity surrounding loneliness, and try to embrace it. Here are my thoughts.
Embracing loneliness
It’s taken me a while to learn to embrace loneliness. This past year has been a total rollercoaster of emotions, and I’ve found myself looking forward to those moments alone – even if it’s just to gather my thoughts. For example, when I was preparing for my trip to New York, I knew there would be some parts of the day where I would be on my own – being in a totally different country, and in a city I didn’t really know seemed so daunting at first, but looking back I feel that the time I spent walking around on my own, and loosing myself in the city and my own thoughts was just what I needed.
I know I’m lucky to have time completely to myself, and the option of doing what I please. Because even though I’m extremely happy in my totally awesome marriage, I don’t feel consumed by it all and I feel that I can do things alone when I want to without the pressure of having to spend time with my husband - I’m lucky that he gets that and totally accepts me for who I am.
If there’s one thing I could say to people that find themselves feeling alone, don’t wish the time away. Enjoying the present is so important because time is so precious. You can get through the tough times – they pass eventually and life can start to feel normal again.
And really, you’re never alone. It’s just part of the journey you’re experiencing along the way. 

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